Trends from Spring 2009
I do my best to keep this blog on a fairly positive note. Sure, I have moments of snarkiness, but generally, I feel I make my criticism constructive and do my best to couch any unnecessary meanness in light, fluffy jokery. I also think it's unwise to make big, concrete statements about things one should never do, buy, wear, combine, display, etc. I am the kind of person who sometimes has to warm up to brand new trends when they're on the fringe. In the beginning, I am usually not a supporter of something in part, because I am unfamiliar with it, or I'm not sure how I would work it into my home, wardrobe, daily life, etc. I often wind up growing to appreciate things I never thought I would, when given some time and context.
However, sometimes I come across things I do not and will never understand, and I really want to rant about them. But, in the name of remaining upbeat, I try to refrain. I've come across a few blogs lately devoted entirely to ranting about a given subject, and the writers manage to make them amusing and hilarious, not totally a-hole-y. So, I've decided to give it a shot. On occasion, I will tackle a well-vetted (i.e. something I've not understood for a long period of time and therefore feel I never will, so I won't eat my words later) design subject with criticism that may not be particularly constructive, but it will be fun (for me, at least). I am calling it "Things I Just Don't Get." My first victim is the bizarro HAREM PANTS.
There have been plenty of trends that I don't follow, but harem pants irk me like none other. I think it's because they flatter no one (not even the walking hangers on the runways!), so I'm baffled as to why anyone would wear them in public, and not get paid to do so. And it's not just that they don't flatter (I mean, those babydoll dresses and shirts don't really flatter everyone either, but I don't hate them), it's that they go beyond not flattering. They change the wearer's shape, make them look dowdy or poopy-filled. Ok, I'm getting mean. But come on!
According to Wikipedia, Harem Pants are long pants are a cross between a skirt and a pair of skinny jeans, as the legs, from the knees down, are fitted, while the crotch area is loose and baggy, as if it were cut to be a skirt. FINE. Somehow, they manage to look far less ridiculous when worn in the traditional manner, on Indian women:
A far, far cry from this, don't you think?
There have been plenty of trends that I don't follow, but harem pants irk me like none other. I think it's because they flatter no one (not even the walking hangers on the runways!), so I'm baffled as to why anyone would wear them in public, and not get paid to do so. And it's not just that they don't flatter (I mean, those babydoll dresses and shirts don't really flatter everyone either, but I don't hate them), it's that they go beyond not flattering. They change the wearer's shape, make them look dowdy or poopy-filled. Ok, I'm getting mean. But come on!
Oh! The options: convertibles!! Pants...or a cat-suit!
I just don't understand the harem pant craze. I didn't get it back in the 1980s, and I don't get it now. As you know, M.C. Hammer had a fairly successful run while wearing them, but where did that get him? Bankruptcy.
Ok, not because of the pants, but still, they are part of his story. When they came out a while back, I was sure it was a passing trend that the runway people dreamed up, and assumed it would never fly on the street. But, suddenly, they're everywhere! And not just in uber-trendy neighborhoods. I saw a chick wearing them in my neck of the woods, which is not exactly a hotbed of downtown chic (yet, although it's on it's way).
Ok, not because of the pants, but still, they are part of his story. When they came out a while back, I was sure it was a passing trend that the runway people dreamed up, and assumed it would never fly on the street. But, suddenly, they're everywhere! And not just in uber-trendy neighborhoods. I saw a chick wearing them in my neck of the woods, which is not exactly a hotbed of downtown chic (yet, although it's on it's way).
The pants really run the gamut in pricing, from Jean Paul Gautier's, sold at Bergdorf Goodman ($435), to those sold at The Gap and J.C. Penny for a fraction of the cost ($10.80)
From left: Jean Paul Gautier, The Gap, J.C. Penny
You can try and dress 'em up in a fancy-ass fabric (in this case, silk), but, I'm telling you, it doesn't help.
Is it just me, or do these look like they were hewn from garbage bags?
J.Crew has sold out of their sequined version, complete with drawstring waist. Huh? And the company's Creative Director, Jenna Lyons, seemingly can't get enough of them–she's been seen wearing them all over town and in the media! The kicker: those bad boys cost a whopping $650!
I'm going to end on a high note: faded denim drawstring harem pants. I really don't have a comment:
I'm going to end on a high note: faded denim drawstring harem pants. I really don't have a comment:
If there's something you just don't get and you'd like me to rant about, by all means, send me an email describing it. If I agree with you, I'll create a post for it.
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